Nov. 22, 2006
It was a previous November that I was reading a book to my children about dinosaurs. The topic of extinction came up and the kids were grasping at the concept.
In the hope of increasing understanding through a different perspective, I told them about the near-extinction of panda bears. Suddenly, what had been a fun reading about dinosaurs was now a mess of tears and distress about my oldest child’s favorite animal.
At that moment I made a decision about what I did and didn’t want this revelation about pandas to mean to my children. On one end of the possibilities would be a perception of helplessness; on the other, empowerment and hope.I remember as a child discovering on television the plight of third-world children. I was transfixed whenever I saw the images: innocent victims, bare feet, dirt floors, flies, and round, hungry bellies
I remember my feelings of urgency, my knowledge of abundance that could be shared, but also my complete helplessness. I was a child with a passion that no one I knew shared.
I collected aluminum cans from around my neighborhood with the hope of collecting the initial $20 needed to begin the Adopt-A-Child program. I rallied my neighbors and friends around my cause, but when our long efforts amounted to cents instead of dollars, I realized time that even if I raised the $20, I’d never be able to sustain the demanded monthly amount afterward. It was hopeless.
This is what I thought of as I watched my own children in tears about the near-extinction of panda bears. The saving of pandas was never my personal passion. Innocent child victims move me. But I knew this could be a defining moment for my kids. Would they see themselves as helpless individuals in a world of problems? Or could I help them see their capabilities and responsibilities as humanists?
I rallied my kids around their cause. We got online and learned about the declining panda population. We found an organization raising money to improve the panda habitat. And we made a plan. We called it our Thanksgiving Campaign.
The kids’ role was to draw pictures and write a letter soliciting just $1 from friends and family. My job was to type a more formal letter of explanation, make copies and mail them out. The purpose was to communicate to my children that they have a part in the betterment of society and that they also have an ability to make a change.
Now, I have a confession to make. While the kids accomplished their tasks, I got busy with the demands of holiday preparations and never completed mine.
The kids eventually got distracted with their birthdays (two in December), as well as Christmas, and the "campaign" was forgotten. But despite our failure, I believe there was one success. My kids know that they can help with problems they see around them. They jump at the chance to contribute to a cause, volunteering to donate their own items or money when they learn of someone in need.
This year I took a less-demanding approach to empowering my children to be responsible and give to others. I offered to buy as much of their Halloween candy as they were willing to sell me. My oldest earned $2, the next earned $3 and the youngest earned $5.
I also helped them set up their own yard sale (despite my distaste for them) where they could sell their unwanted toys -- perfect timing before the influx of new things they’ll get in December. Trinity earned $30 from a kitchen set she grew out of and was so proud of herself!
Whether my kids choose a cause to donate money to, use their money to buy gifts for the holidays, or save up for something special, they are armed with an important principle of humanism. In this case, the principle at work is expressed in the Humanist Manifesto III: Humanism is a progressive philosophy of life that, without supernaturalism, affirms our ability and responsibility to lead ethical lives of personal fulfillment that aspire to the greater good of humanity.
Noell Hyman writes for her blog, AgnosticMom.com. She has been blogging since August of 2005. Relatively new to the humanist landscape, Noell declared herself a humanist some time in the year of 2002 after leaving religion, specifically the Mormon Church. A stay-at-home mother of three young children, Noell's aim is to reach other non-religious parents who find themselves isolated in the struggle to raise a healthy family without religion. Noell wants to make "Agnostic Mom" a humanist and secular household name. Visit: www.AgnosticMom.com
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